Leadership - Expectations vs. Agreements

According to Jim Collins the author of Good to Great, one of the best business books ever written, to have a great company you have to answer these 3 questions with a yes.

Do we have the right people, doing the right things, right?

Well my coach Steve Chandler has always stressed that you can't get people to do things right through setting Expectations. He believes only in Agreements.

Having trouble managing and leading people - read on - it works!

Human beings were not put on this planet to live up to the expectations of others. They weren't put here for that. They know that deep down. They have a rebellious, free spirit in them that knows it was not put here to live up to another mortal human being's expectations.

Therefore, whenever you use the "expectation" word, you create rebellion, and you create less likelihood that what you expect will happen. Less likelihood by expecting it!!!! So by expecting something, you make it go away--you don't draw it to you. You chase it away because it's toxic, it's cowardly, it's radio-active, it is cancerous. Expectation is.

I can't stress it enough. I've never seen expectations work as sound self-programming. Any kind of positive benefit in any relationship (personal or otherwise) -- I've never seen it work. I've never seen it bring people closer together. I've never seen it make one partner more faithful. I've never seen it do anything, but damage. Terrible damage. Every time it is used inside the human system.

Now what I have seen work beautifully on the other hand, in the other way, is agreements. So the person's late for a meeting. I meet with him and say, "Let's you and I create an agreement and I'll tell you why I'm requesting we create an agreement. I would like to have you at the meeting…the whole meeting from beginning to end every time. You are that valuable to me. You're that important to me. You're that important to the rest of the team. Your strolling in late does not work for me. It's not wrong, it's not unjustified, it simply does not work in what I'm creating. Now let's you and I talk so we can get an agreement; and an agreement is something that works for you, otherwise, I don't want you to agree to it."

So we work on an agreement together, I understand the other person's concerns, they were in another person's meeting that morning that got out late. We find a way to have that not be the case anymore. We agree. We shake hands. We now have an agreement.

If you want people to do something, create an agreement. Don't just "expect" them to do it. They won't. Or, haven't you noticed?